Sep 19, 2008

Caitlin's Way: Money is not important, except when it really, really is.

Season 2, Episode 29: Money Walks
Aired: October 14, 2000

Well, gang, here we are for another fun-filled Caitlin's Way episode, where Caitlin and Taylor (the blond girl) find themselves stuck in "the city," Eric and Brent discover the trials and tribulations of shopping, and Griffin spends all of his time alternating between being stuck on a bench and writing a song. Let's just delve right in, shall we?

The show opens up in class. Taylor informs everyone that they have enough money to buy a gift for their teacher, who's getting married. Caitlin is reading some local paper and discovers a photography exhibit in "the city," which she can't get to because she has no money. Caitlin takes a moment to ponder the unfairness of life, while Griffin notices that some shop in "the city" is selling used amps. The boys really want an amp because they have a band, so they decide to pool their money together and buy this thing. Taylor announces she's going to go into "the city" to buy a tablecloth with the $110 the class raised (because a tablecloth is the centerpiece of a home, you see), and Caitlin sees her opportunity to get a ride into the city, so she stands up and announces that she's coming too. Blond Girl...I mean Taylor...is stunned speechless, but looks pretty pissed. Enter opening sequence.

Since this is season 2, it looks like whoever controls things like the opening sequence realized it was too long and sucked. So they cut it down, thereby giving me less to complain about. It still sucks, though.

Okay, back on point. Taylor and Caitlin arrive in "the city." The city looks to be Calgary, where this show was shot, which would then make some amount of sense given the largest city in Montana is Billings. If you haven't heard of Billings, don't worry. It doesn't matter. All that really does matter is that apparently Caitlin's town does not sell tablecloths. Who knows why. So the two girls arrive in this Calgary-type town that doesn't exist in Montana, and Taylor is already pissed because Caitlin threw coffee or something on her shirt. Really, this is a bitchy move on Caitlin's part. By the age of 15, I'd think kids should be past throwing liquids on each other in retribution, but Caitlin apparently isn't. So Taylor stomps off to look at tablecloths in this tablecloth-filled city in Montana. Caitlin starts taking really shitty pictures of everything around her, which is not remarkable or interesting or remotely approaching being good subject matter. She should really stop wasting her film.

Eric and Brent arrive and head to the guitar shop place or whatever, where they listen to the sales guy talk about amps, all of which I didn't attempt to comprehend. Brent calls Griffin, who's stuck on a bench waiting for his bus, who asks Brent to ask the sales guy about an amp that would fit a more Latin sound. Brent is reticent to do this, but does and is shocked that the sales guy is all into Latin stuff. They pick an amp that is too expensive, so they go out into Billings or Calgary or wherever and try to awe people with their skateboarding skills to get money. Which they don't get because no one cares. In fact, they're mostly nuisances.

Meanwhile Taylor finds Caitlin and tells her all about this great tablecloth she found! Like, oh my God! It's a fancy label and it's $20 more than what she can spend because she bought a shirt to replace the one Caitlin ruined. See, it's all Caitlin's fault. Caitlin gets all bitchy again and goes to play that stupid three-card trick game to get Taylor's $20. Taylor informs her it's a scam, and Caitlin stupidly says that she knows that, therefore she can win the game. So she plays and completely loses. Then she plays again and completely loses. Seriously. It's a scam for a reason, Caitlin. If she knew all the tricks in the book, then she'd know the one where the card she's looking for is taken out of the equation entirely, making winning impossible. I have no option but to presume Caitlin is stupid now. This is pretty much Taylor's opinion also. Plus, she's really pissed off because now they only have $70. Which they lose when Caitlin throws liquid on her again and she snaps, throwing liquid on Caitlin.

So the girls decide to go put the $70 they don't have to use, and Eric and Brent find the $70 and buy the amp. Then they all accidentally meet up and discover what happened, so Brent takes the amp back and they sell their bus tickets and decide to just get the stupid present later. Only this kid wanders by and Caitlin goes all "I was a street kid too!" on the poor thing and insists on buying him lunch and a bus ticket (he wasn't actually a street kid, I should mention, because he was trying to get to Seattle or Chicago and lost his ticket during a bus break, getting him stuck in Calgary/Billings) with the money they have. Then Griffin shows up and plays his new song for everyone. People start to give them money while they play, and that's where we end.

No horses this time around, guys. Perhaps next time.

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