The Saddle Club # 86: Secret Horse

The Saddle Club # 86: Secret Horse

Cover:

This has to be one of my least favorite SC covers – at least out of those done in this particular style. I have…so many questions when I look at the front of this book.

1. Who is this horse supposed to be? Spoiler alert: this book is about Samson – Delilah and Cobalt’s son, who is unfailingly described as black. So who is this giant, nondescript chestnut?
2. Why is his halter askew/why is he wearing a stud chain?
3. Why are the girls wearing tennis shoes to the barn?
4. Finally, why are Stevie and Carol looking so…morose and vacant, respectively? Lisa’s expression is the only one I can remotely comprehend. She’s clearly marveling over the horse’s disproportionately large head. Or maybe she too is wondering who the heck the horse is.

Blurb:

“THE SADDLE CLUB HAS A SECRET!

Stevie Lake, Carole Hanson, and Lisa Atwood are hoping to compete in a prestigious horse show. To that end, they’re doing everything they can to stay on stable owner Max Regnery’s good side – including doing extra chores around Pine Hollow, such as exercising stable horses.

Veronica diAngelo is sure she’ll be making the trip to the horse show – just as she’s sure she’ll be bringing home a blue ribbon. And of course Veronica has no intention of lifting a finger to help anyone.

The Saddle Club would love to beat Veronica, but how? She and her horse are tough competition. Then Lisa takes one of the horses over a jump, and he’s a natural. Now the Saddle Club has to keep their secret weapon under wraps and teach Veronica a lesson she won’t forget.”

Summary:

The Macrae Valley Open is apparently the show of all shows – the kind of competition that attracts all the best riders from everywhere and has the USET members turning out in full force. It’s the kind of show the Saddle Club has only ever dreamed of going to, which explains why we’ve never heard of it before. Well, actually, Carole has but that’s to be expected. Stevie apparently can’t even pronounce it and Lisa gets butterflies at the mere thought – also par for the course.

Once the girls find out that Veronica is going to the Macrae, they immediately swing into “me too!” mode and set out to prove how indispensible they are to Max and the general running of Pine Hollow. You’d think by now Max would realize that his stable would fall apart without the hard work, dedication and know-how of three middle school girls. At least they’re not yet sleeping in the barn like they would be if they lived in the Thoroughbred series. This flurry of barn work comes at just the right time; Red, Pine Hollow’s head stablehand (I always assumed ONLY stablehand) is heading off to a famous rider’s farm to be a working student for a month. Because apparently, being Max’s right hand man/Veronica’s servant for umpteen years hasn’t taught him enough.

Spending their every waking moment the barn has its upside. When they’re not raking the driveway, cleaning endless piles of dirty tack and scrubbing water buckets, the SC girls get to exercise horses. This includes the Prince William of Pine Hollow, Samson. After learning the basics at a nearby trainer’s, Samson has turned into a fine riding horse and the girls can’t wait to try him out.

Lisa exercises the gelding first and after a great schooling session on the flat, she decides, in an uncharacteristic lapse of judgment, to try him over the jumps. Naturally, he’s phenomenal and Lisa starts dreaming of taking him to the Macrae, since that is the logical place to start a baby green, as a junior jumper in an A-rated show. (Note: in the hunter ring, Juniors compete at a height of 3’6” – I don’t know if that is the same height in the jumper division, but I’m willing to bet that it’s close. In contrast, Baby Green Hunters and Pre-Green Hunters compete over fences that are 2’6” and 3,” respectively.)

So, of course, once Carole and Stevie realize how talented Samson is over fences, they throw themselves into “Project Secret Horse” with reckless abandon. The plan seems to be threefold: train Samson over fences, prove their indispensability to Max by making Pine Hollow so clean you could eat off the barn aisle and spy on/befriend Veronica to stay on her good side so she won’t rent out the entire Pine Hollow van for herself – or something like that. I’ll admit, I’m not really clear on the third part of that plan – but then, what good is a Saddle Club project if it doesn’t involve a little espionage at Veronica’s expense?

Meanwhile, Lisa combats some inner demons. She wants to ride Samson in the Macrae but isn’t sure she can or that she’ll be allowed. She also thinks that Carole will probably want to ride the gelding herself and doesn’t want to step on her friend’s toes. Oh, and she falls off Samson during a training session and that sends her into the classic Lisa Atwood spiral of paralyzing self-doubt. Which reminds me – how’s therapy going there Lisa?

Long story short, they debut their plan to Max (earlier than they would have liked, since he happened upon a training session one morning – the one morning he sets foot out of his office in weeks, apparently) and instead of being livid that they jumped his homebred youngster without his permission, he hears out their plan. Lisa gives a little speech, Carole vouches for Lisa to ride Samson, Stevie gets even with Veronica (somehow – doesn’t she always?) and Max agrees to let Lisa ride. It’s off to the Macrae Valley Open which we’ll read about in the very next book!

List:

• Page 1: Huh. Right here on the first page, a reference is made to “stable employees.” Employees, plural. Who are these mysterious employees and why don’t we ever get to meet them?
• Page 3: There goes Red, off to Vermont for a month. I’ll have to ask around – I wonder if one month is the average length of time for one to be a working student…seems like a pretty brief period to me, but then what do I know. I am interested, however, in what Red will do with his newly honed three day eventing skills when he returns from Toby MacIntosh’s farm. Surely he doesn’t need to go all the way to Vermont to become better at tacking up Veronica’s horse for her or teaching the little kids how to pick out a pony’s hoof.
• Page 6: We make it this far before being reminded (a) how the girls formed the Saddle Club and (b) that there are only two rules, etc., etc. Also on this page, Carole mentions that the SC will pitch in to make up for Red’s absence. Pay attention to how much work they do. Red must be freakin’ Superman if it takes three able-bodied girls to do what he can do in a single bound.
• Page 9: Ugh, how could I have forgotten Danny’s show name. Who names a show horse “Go For Blue?” I mean really.
• Page 12: Here’s where the scheming begins. Call me naïve, but if Carole, Lisa and Stevie want to go to the Macrae in the Pine Hollow van, why don’t they just…ask? I know if I wanted to hop on board and go to a horse show, all I’d have to do is say “sign me up!” cut a check and pack my trunk. Pony Club must be different.
• Page 16: If Carole wants to live up to the expectation that she will make “the Team” (USET) someday, girlfriend had better get a move-on in the junior division at rated shows! Scrubbing water buckets is only going to get her so far in life.
• Page 18: Oh dear God, Stevie just found out that some riders – gasp! – pay someone ELSE to braid their horses for them!
• Page 20: Lisa wonders aloud if Prancer’s girth will fit Samson. This launches Carole into a mini-lecture on tack fit and conformation. Boy if I was this girl’s friend in real life, I’d learn to tune her out in a hurry.
• Page 24: Lisa’s out hacking Samson and after twenty minutes of “dressage” (because that sounds more impressive than “shoulder-ins, leg yielding and collection/extension,” which is, I guarantee you, the closest Lisa gets to doing “dressage”), she decides to take Samson over a jump. Here are my thoughts on this: (a) This horse doesn’t belong to Lisa, nor is he a school horse, (b) he is Max’s horse and he is young – she does not have permission to jump him and (c) there’s no one around – you wouldn’t catch me jumping a horse I’d never ridden before unsupervised.
• Page 26: After trotting and cantering Samson over the small jump “several” times, Lisa decides, in her infinite wisdom, to jump the brush jump that is alternately described in this book as “big,” “huge,” and one that “only the best riders at Pine Hollow” practice over. *head smack* Oh dear, oh dear, Lisa. If anyone ever pulled a stunt like that at my barn, you can bet they’d be out the door in a heartbeat. I don’t want to overstate this but let’s be logical here: you’re on a horse for the first time, you don’t know how much training it’s had, you trot it over one fence and it completely over-jumps, proving that it’s completely green. Naturally, the next step is go galloping pell-mell toward the biggest jump on the property just for the thrill of it.
• Page 36: In a nice little blip of continuity “an Olympic horse” Carole has ridden is mentioned. Based on the context, I can only assume we’re talking about Southwood.
• Page 37: Apparently, “Max doesn’t need another show horse.” I wasn’t aware that Max actually HAS any show horses. Doesn’t the man run a Pony Club branch? Who rides these “show horses,” I wonder?
• Pages 39 and 42: Lisa never learns. Just once I’d like her to say, “Actually Mom, these Greek vases are about the most boring things I’ve ever seen” and “You know Mom, Veronica’s a bitch.” But oh no, we mustn’t make waves. It’s always “maybe you’re right, Mom.”
• Page 52: Here is the only time you’ll read about any of the girls second-guessing their decision to train Samson as a jumper. Carol wonders if what they’re doing is “stupid and reckless.” In a word, yes.
• Page 56: Oh man, Carole tells Lisa that “no matter how talented a horse is, you don’t want to rush him.” Yeah, ‘cause you guys are really going at a snail’s pace here. From totally green over fences to junior jumpers at a top-rated show in about a month – that’s standard, right? Riiiiiight.
• Page 58: Again, I’m a little flabbergasted at the amount of work these girls are doing around the barn. From sunup to sundown, sometimes staying after dark…I’d love to see their tans at the end of the summer.
• Page 83: No, Carole, Lisa isn’t “very sensitive to other people’s feelings,” she’s a doormat who doesn’t have the stones to come right out and ask for what she wants. “Hating conflict” doesn’t even scratch the surface, darlin.’
• Page 84: Geez, just how big IS the brush jump? BB makes it sound about five feet tall!
• Pages 85 thru 87: These three pages pretty much convince me that everyone in this book is totally clueless. Lisa lets Samson get too strong during her ride because she doesn’t want to hamper his enthusiasm. So, like green horses are wont to do, he blasts over a fence and jumps Lisa right out of the saddle. At no point do Carole or Mr. Grover (an actual horse trainer) call out to her to collect him or slow him or any variation of “whoa!” Then when Lisa (rightly) says that the mistake was hers, Carole brushes it off and basically says it happened because Samson is green and this was bound to happen eventually. Because God forbid we shatter Lisa’s confidence.
• Page 103: Why is Stevie surprised that Veronica’s bedroom is one giant display of ostentatious frivolity?
• Page 112: I actually really enjoy Stevie’s response to Carole and Lisa asking why she doesn’t want to ride Samson in the Macrae. I have the feeling that writing Stevie must be very enjoyable.
• Pages 115 thru 117: Max discovers what the Saddle Club is up to. Dun dun DUN! Lucky for them he’s not mad – although I can’t fathom why. I also can’t fathom how he didn’t figure it out earlier.
• Page 119: Ha ha! Max is “a horseman” who is “responsible for his horses and his students.” Again, I have to ask how he didn’t figure out what the girls were doing, responsible hands-on horseman that he is.
• Page 121: I can’t really explain why, but when Lisa says “Samson by Cobalt out of Delilah” I grind my teeth a little. She knows that his sire and dam aren’t famous, right? I mean, they’re both really nice horses and everything, but what does she think she’s proving by throwing that out there? Maybe it’s just supposed to add an unnecessary flourish to her little speech.
• Page 138: I get a migraine just reading Mrs. Atwood’s dialogue. She. Is. Such. A. Moron. Her daughter just told her she gets to achieve a life goal and ride a fabulous horse that she’s been helping train herself in a hugely important show and the woman goes on and on about how important a society event this is and how she’ll need a haircut and if Lisa wins “the trophy” she’ll get to go to the winner’s circle (Mrs. Atwood clearly doesn’t realize this isn’t the Kentucky Derby), and on and on. Again, can I get a “cram it, Mom!” Lisa?
• Page 141: No, Lisa, you didn’t “get into a fence wrong,” you let the horse get too revved up and it got you dumped.
• Page 143: Carole mentions that once, at one of these top-rated shows, a girl cut Carole off in line at the toilet even though she knew Carole was on deck to ride. I have a question and a comment about this – when did Carole go to all these fancy schmancy shows? I know I haven’t read EVERY book in the series, but I don’t seem to remember a lot of A-rated horse shows in between riding camp, Pony Club rallies in England, teaching a movie star to ride, learning to wrangle cattle, etc. Oh, and I guess that’ll teach you to use the bathroom before you leave the stabling area, won’t it Carole?
• Page 149: Veronica can’t join the group at TD’s because she’s at home with her coach, discussing “strategy.” What the heck kind of show jumping “strategy” is there to discuss when you haven’t even seen the course?
• Page 150: The girls act surprised that making a living in the horse industry is tough. Carole’s in for a rude awakening when she’s not able to simultaneously be a vet, a trainer, a competitive rider and a breeder isn’t she?

My Verdict:

You’d think, with the amount of sniping I did throughout this book, that I hated it. Well, you’re kind of right, but not totally right. I don’t understand how the girls pulled off Project Secret Horse for as long as they did. I can’t believe we’re supposed to buy that a horse that’s never jumped before spends a month being trained by three 13 year-old girls and is suddenly ready for the big time. I’m really confused as to why Stevie needed to spy on Veronica/pretend to be her friend. Oh and Lisa got on my nerves. All that being said, I like Saddle Club installments where the minor characters are kept to a minimum and the plot revolves mainly around Stevie, Carole and Lisa. Stevie has some great moments in this book, and Veronica is deliciously snooty. If this book was a movie, I’d be able to look past the inconsistencies and occasional lapses in credulity because I liked the characters. Most of the time.

You think you can double cross people...like our Muslim president from Kenya?!

Luck
1.2: "Episode Two"

You know, I don't think I can fully support a show that doesn't bother to appropriately title their episodes. Are you above actual titles, David Milch?

Okay. Episode Two brings us some updates on these people that populate Luck's less than rainbows and sunshine world of horse racing. Ace meets his probation officer, who seems "decent" because he turns on the sink faucet when Ace has trouble urinating into a cup. Although I did like the little detail when the officer asked Ace what he did while he was in prison, because if you can't pee when someone's watching it must be horrible being male. Ace simply says that people made adjustments, which goes a long way in showing that this sweet little man who appears so polite and clean cut (who doesn't like it when his trainer curses, for instance) is actually very frightening.

But then there was a lot of random talking I didn't follow. I think someone wants to buy Santa Anita Park, in which case I'm sure there will be more random talking that I will completely tune out. I basically heard blah blah Santa Anita blah blah buy blah monies blah.

Speaking of monies, The Degenerate is busy blowing his portion of his pick six earnings on poker. Because he sucks at poker. This nameless guy keeps taunting him about it, which I think was my favorite part of the episode. Oxygen Man is pissed that The Degenerate keeps blowing their randomly earned dollars, because they went to great effort to remain anonymous. Oxygen Man can't have The Degenerate out there losing thousands of dollars a night. They have crappy reputations to maintain! The others do not agree. In fact, Third Wheel wants to claim the horse that won them the money (more on this in a minute), and Dick wants to buy spiffy suits so he can please the women. Women, as well all know, are all about shiny packaging.

So let's talk horses for a little bit. Nick Nolte grumbles some more about this horse that is the son of the previously awesome (now dead) Delphi. He decides to talk to Gary Stevens about how Delphi is actually Alydar. People insured him for $30 million and then broke his legs to collect the pay out. Gary Stevens, naturally, gets to ride Delphi's colt instead of Exercise Girl From England Or Somewhere.

And then we get to this claiming race, and the horse who shouldn't have been in the claiming race anyway. The trainer, who is completely crazy and I have very little patience for, gets pissed off that he was claimed and I just want to slap people when they make these decisions and then get angry when the very obvious outcome happens and they vow revenge. Which is basically what happens. Only Third Wheel does not wind up claiming the horse, as someone else had a claim in on it, and I think it's apparent that this quartet has crap luck when not gambling on horses.

Speaking of crap luck, Dick gets roofied by the women he's trying to seduce...I'm not sure why...and then they try to attack him during their unsuccessful threesome. He manages to escape and winds up bloodied and roofied outside of Oxygen Man's hotel. However, The Degenerate manages to hit a win streak at the poker table after losing yet more money, walking away with some amount of cash and reclaiming a little more of his dignity.

And then we wind up in bed with Ace again, as he monologues about something. I guess it was important. I, however, was too busy wondering if we were going to end every episode with Ace talking to his chauffeur as he lounges around on his bed in his PJs.

I just don't know about this show. I can't tell if it's really going anywhere, or, if it is, that I'll actually be interested in these people when it finally gets up to speed. For what it's worth, I liked this episode better than the pilot, but that's probably just because it's benefiting from all the ground work the pilot laid down.

It still makes me feel dirty after watching it, though. It's very good in this regard.

Heartland 1.9: Ghost from the Past

Heartland
1.9: Ghost from the Past

Psst. Did you know Ty knew actual people during his shady past full of group homes? Well, he did. And they are, shockingly, also shady. From this, I conclude that all orphans or otherwise abandoned youth are criminals in training.

But not to worry, Ty is a juvenile delinquent with a heart of gold, and isn't about to let some trashy memory with horrible taste in jewelry derail him from his goal of non-probation. This trashy memory is named Kerry-Anne, and she's working in the kitchen at Briar Ridge, home of resident antagonist, Ashley.

However, we're going to back up a second and witness Mrs. Bell have a heart attack, which I suppose is her graceful exit from the show. Mrs. Bell's pony, Sugarfoot, is transferred to Heartland, where he decides that he is above living in stalls and barges into the house to watch Lou shower. Lou, who has had a horse related epiphany thanks to her fond memories of Sugarfoot when she was a child, decides that this is all just great. In fact, they should never give Sugarfoot back. And when Mrs. Bell's niece comes to collect the pony, Lou has a panic attack and comes up with a lame reason to keep the pony right where he is...in the bathroom, in the house.

Meanwhile, Kerry-Anne is planting the seeds of discontent, or trying to, by being super outgoing and horrible to all around her. Somehow she manages to get in on one of those group dinners I love so much, casually chatting about how much sex she and Ty were probably having back in that group home, and also that they are super awesome together, and Amy had better watch herself. No one is impressed, but she keeps talking, and is rudely shot down by Ty afterward. Just what is Kerry-Anne thinking? Ty is a responsible horsey teen now! These people don't steal cars, Kerry-Anne. Pick up a horse book and you'll understand.

Rebuffed, Kerry-Anne immediately runs into Ashley, who takes her under her wing so she can hear all the Ty gossip. Kerry-Anne provides, and then steals Ashley's ugly horseshoe pendant. Ashley immediately decides that Ty was in on the stealing, so Ty has to go hunt down Kerry-Anne on her way out of town, fix her car, and take back the necklace. He arrives back in time to sit down with his probation officer, reputation still intact.

This episode was dull. I think I will probably resort to random point giving in the next installments, and I will now randomly assign points to this episode as a whole. That number will be 39.1.

Heartland 1.8: Out of the Darkness

Heartland
1.8: Out of the Darkness

Yet another episode tied directly to a series book by the same name, Heartland gives us serious trauma in the form of Gallant Prince and his trainer. Gallant Prince was once famous, in that he won something. Amy likes to casually watch his race to find motivation, during which the race announcer says, "and Gallant Prince pulls away! He's going to win...the race!"

Oh, yeah? He's going to win "the race." I always find attempts to rewrite race announcing hilarious, if not completely maddening (Secretariat, anyone?)

Anyway, Lisa's ex-husband (shhh, we don't know she has an ex-husband yet) trailers Gallant Prince over to Heartland and Jack goes off about how the ranch isn't equipped to hold a stallion. Just what are they equipped to handle? I am exceedingly unimpressed with this operation. Nevertheless, their unequippedness doesn't keep Gallant Prince away. Amy takes him on, and the first night a storm rolls through and completely pushes the horse over the edge. Gallant Prince, you see, was once involved in a fire and his trainer was "on watch" that night, and was also severely burned. But not to worry, Amy is on the case!

Meanwhile, Mallory tells Ty that he needs to just come out and tell the object of his pining affection all about his turgid love. For, you see, Mallory loves Ty and seems to be very bad at taking her own advice. Why can't Ty understand her nonsensical girl crush on him? Damn Amy and her stupid, perfect hair and her stupid, perfect face! Ty doesn't get it at all, so Mallory walks off in a huff and yells at Jack that he and Lisa are equally annoying and they just need to come out and tell Lisa he wants to date her and not do this stupid dancing around each other and pretending that they're only going to a horse auction. YOU ARE OLD, Mallory proclaims. YOU DON'T HAVE TIME TO BE STUPID, LIKE TY.

Jack does not listen, and consequently he winds up stranded on the side of the road with Lisa and a picnic involving turkey sandwiches. And it was beautiful. I wanted to be there and soak in the beauty, and I probably would have yelled at them to shut up or go make out in their truck or something so I could appreciate the beauty in peace.

Eventually they get the auction, and Lisa's ex-husband pops up to say, "Hey, you know my wife!" And Jack plows out of there faster than he could (probably) spit tobacco onto the ground, abandoning Lisa in the middle of nowhere.

While this is happening, Amy is trying to talk Gallant Prince's owner out of his man cave. His wife stands by, utterly useless, and in a huff, Amy gives up and is subjected to Ty's attempt to be open about his feelings, nearly kissing her before Amy tearfully proclaims that she doesn't want their relationship to be ruined because kissing ruins lives.

Eventually, the trainer guy shows up anyway and bonds with Gallant Prince, who is thrilled to see him. But then Lisa's ex-husband shows up to yell about how the trainer cannot be near the horse, since it's all the trainer's fault the horse is crazy. Amy is all SEE SENSE, to the guy, but Lisa's ex-husband is blind to sense and orders the horse into the trailer. Lisa tells her ex-husband he is a complete ass, and then yells at Jack for leaving her at the auction, because if he'd stayed around he would have clearly had a better shot with her. And now...well, yeah, he still has a pretty good shot. Maybe Lisa has low standards?

But then it comes out that his assistant trainer or whoever/pathetic excuse of the ex-husband's son set the fire, and Gallant Prince knows. Of course he does. So ex-husband offers the trainer his job back, and all is well.

Oh, and Amy and Tim go on a horseback ride together. It was also pretty.

Heartland 1.7

Heartland
1.7: Come What May

Out of nowhere I started watching Heartland again, because I am, sadly, just a little bit in love with it. It's just so pretty, you guys. And there's teen angst, and storming out of family dinners, and riding that looks halfway competent if done by people who aren't Ty. How can one resist temptations such as this?

So I gave in.

I haven't read the book that corresponds with this episode, but having seen the back of the volume in question it looks like a mirror image. The ranch is taking on a pregnant mare, and they all freak because the ranch isn't equipped to have a pregnant mare. But take the mare they do, because they're all such adorable bleeding hearts. Meanwhile, Mallory -- the extraneous kid who is always there and seems to have no relation to anyone -- is teaching Ty how to ride and this results in galloping across the Canadian wilderness, hysterics, and falling. Only Ty loves it. He wants to gallop, be hysterical, and fall some more! For then he will be able to ride in the upcoming round up and be respected by Amy and finally, finally, he can put away the baseball cap and know the sweetness of the cowboy hat.

But because of this pregnant mare, Amy and Ty decide that she can't be trusted with her pregnancy and watch her like super parental hawks in four hour shifts. Meanwhile, Ben (who was previously seen in a domestic dispute with his horse) is attempting to avoid his aunt, and is put out that Amy decides the mare is more important than his show and he can just be an adult for once and go train himself. Except he's too busy being irate that his aunt sent him jumps from France and is acting out by storming out of the kitchen and throwing around half-peeled potatoes when Amy tries to persuade him to chat to the woman on the phone. Who will peel those potatoes now, Ben? You said you could cook and you are full of lies!

So Ty skips out on the pregnant mare, leaving Amy on double duty so he can go wave Jack's cowboy hat at cows. Jack is pissed that the lead on the round up is Tim, Amy and Lou's absent father, who points at Jack and informs him that he is old and one day soon he'll be asking good old Tim to help him onto his horse because Jack is too frail to mount by himself. Jack retaliates with physical violence, Ty falls down a ravine after doing something stupid with his horse and a cow, and then everyone doesn't chuckle later when Tim mends Ty's cracked ribs, because cracked ribs are not a joke, Ty. You are a horrible rider.

While the men of the story are off punching each other and taping up injuries in the dark of the Canadian wilds, the women are playing midwife to Melody, who decides she's going to give birth early and Scott, being a typical vet, is too busy and tells them to deal with it. They have all the shoulder length gloves they need. They'll be fine! *click* Lou, put out by this whole thing, shoves her hands up there with Amy and hauls that baby out of there to agonized squeals.

Eventually it all ends with Ben's aunt, Lisa, getting the side eye from Jack, Ben and Lisa bonding over his third place ribbon, and Amy deciding to name the foal Daybreak...although I'm pretty sure the foal isn't hers to name. So, for all of us just catching up on Heartland, Amy didn't storm out at dinner in this episode, Lou did something disgusting and lived through it without soiling her pristine tank top, and Ty earned his cowboy hat by falling off a cliff. This is probably not the best story for him to tell to his future children, actually. He should seriously consider lying.

Watching She-Ra

Claire, who has contributed her comedic take on horse books and various Thoroughbred series installments around here, is taking on She-Ra (yes, you heard me, the whole series) on Tumblr: Watching She-Ra.

Go.

I give you: a horse crazed moon colony? Huh?

Those horse robots are straight out of Rainbow Brite and the Star Stealer.