3.4: Close to Home
Oh, you guys. You guys. Season three just brought out its secret weapon -- the only thing that could possibly divert my attention from gagging at the possibility of Ashleigh/Mike. This is a necessary move on the show's part, because the more Ashleigh and Mike make eyes at each other, the more I want to weep a little inside.
+ Brad's new bull riding friend from last episode, RJ Blake, accompanies Brad to Casa Townsend. RJ decides to make a sandwich, stumbling across Dani in the process. She assumes he's a hired hand and gives him a piece of her mind about why he's in the kitchen, handling her lunch meats. I am immediately intrigued! Brad wanders in to tell her to shut up, and she says, "So, you're in the rodeo." And RJ says, "Does that make me more or less offensive to you?" Staring commences. Ohmigod ohmigod, it's sexy antagonism! I am smitten! (+15)
+ So at the rodeo, Brad is beaten up because he's both a newbie and a rich kid. I have to give Brad two points (+2) for being remarkably cool about this.
+ It is apparent to just about everyone that this rodeo tangent is weird and out of nowhere, so thankfully we get a good supportive sibling talk between Dani and Brad concerning "being something more" or whatever. I'm just noting this because I like it when Dani and Brad lean on each other for support. (+2)
+ Dani decides to catch up on her friends, which have been no shows for at least a season and a half by now. Not shockingly, she discovers through these attempts that she has no friends. Oh, Dani. You're starting to make me like you again. (+1)
+ Dani: Don't you have a home?
RJ: I thought I'd bask in your warmth.
Me: *totally girlie squee*
Five points for banter! (+5)
+ Dani, you get a point (+1) for taking RJ's invitation to dance at the rodeo party as an opportunity to frustrate him by dancing with someone else instead. That gets my stamp of approval! RJ, you get two points (+2) for one upping Dani by finding two girls to dance with in response. Both of you are awesome, so you get another point (+1) just because I find you hilarious.
+ RJ gets five points (+5) for reminding me of Buffy the Vampire Slayer with the line "We've been dancing since we met." Indeed you have been! This is probably why I instantly love you, and have been showering this episode with points.
+ Ashleigh and Jean finally have a good conversation that doesn't inadvertently piss me off because their misunderstandings are completely caused by the stupidity and impossibility of that whole Tor issue. And then they're mistaken as mother and daughter. And this is part of why I find Ashleigh/Mike so creepy. Um, plus one? (+1)
+ More Brad and Dani supportive sibling talk! You have to love the Townsends. They're far more interesting when they're getting along than when they're trying to beat each other down. (+4)
+ Brad gets to play the hero in this episode, saving RJ from goring. He wins the respect, love and adoration of all except for maybe Ashleigh. Sigh. (+2)
+ Um, the RJ/Dani relationship? I cannot get enough. RJ gets five points (+5) for tricking Dani into thinking he's seriously injured after his incident with the bull, Dani gets (+3) for believing him and then smacking him when she realizes he's kidding, RJ gets another point (+1) for being awesome and then there is kissing (+10). And there are random rodeo men laughing and commenting nearby! (+3) Thank you, show. Thank you.
+ Also, the actor who plays RJ gets a point (+1) for playing Rex on Days of our Lives and for actually being able to act. I didn't realize he was a Days of our Lives graduate until after watching this episode, and then I fondly remembered his first Days episode (as a naked possible alien who turned out to not be an alien, obviously, because he was a Brady or something). I can't believe I remember this.
- Stop using that stupid autumn shot of Casa Reese, show! (-1)
- Can I just say that I really don't like the western theme? It's rather sudden and annoying and if RJ wasn't involved I would really like it to go away. (-1)
- Ashleigh wants a new trailer, because hers burned down. Naturally Mike is entering this calf roping competition with his new Andalusian, who just happens to be "good at roping" or something insane. So who is going to be Mike's partner? Ashleigh! Does she know how to rope? Well...I'm sure she can figure it out in a week or so. (-3) And this has to involve Mike/Ashleigh touching. (-5) And Brad has to see it. (-1)
- Because Ashleigh is staying at Casa Reese for the duration, Mike has to be an idiot and barge into the bathroom because he just assumes he is barging in on Todd instead of Ashleigh, who is naked and hopping around and screaming. This made me feel a little sick. Ashleigh/Mike makes me physically ill. This is how awful it is. (-10)
The Bad: 21
63 - 21 = 42
1. Fairy Tale Endings: 16
2. The Feud: 4
3. Moving On: 10
4. Close to Home: 42
Finally, a Wildfire episode I've liked! It's been a long while, show. A long, long while.